That Heart-Wrenching Emotion You’re Feeling? It’s Grief

How to handle your complex emotions during the Covid-19 outbreak.

Now is the time to grow–as a human being and an entrepreneur.

What emotions do you have going on? What have I missed from this list to the left?

As if the pandemic itself isn’t enough to deal with, the emotions associated with these times add a whole different dimension.

Pandemics only happen in the movies.

The end of life as we know it isn’t supposed to happen until an impossible-to-imagine futuristic date.

All of this is foreign—to every human being on the planet.

It only makes sense that along with the unknowns of this “flu” epidemic, you would have many emotions that feel just as mysterious.

People are feeling things they’ve never before felt at such egregious depths. It’s difficult to understand some of these emotions, and even more difficult to figure out how to manage them

One day, you think you’ve made it over the proverbial emotional hump.

Yet, the next morning you wake up feeling even more anxious than you were last week.

What’s up with that?

Well, that’s just how grief works. Yes, I said grief. We tend to associate grief with death, but grief is really about loss. And, the world has lost so much. Not only have we lost people we love and/or admire, we’ve lost things we’ve come to depend on and expect.

    • The familiarity of routine.
    • The closeness of friends and family.
    • The opportunity to keep your business on track to reach your vision.
    • Social activities.
    • The luxury and convenience of dining out.
    • Travel.
    • Enjoying local activities.
    • The chance to celebrate holidays in traditional ways.
    • A sense of control of our daily lives and our future.
    • And, everything that this list is missing for you.

Of course, you are grieving! Yet, instead of hearing, “Marla, I’m grieving, and I want to figure out how to process and honor that.”

I hear, “I should not feel this bad; others have it so much worse than I do.” And, “I wish I could be stronger.”

I hear guilt and shame associated with what is only natural and to be expected at this time—grief. The right to grieve is not hidden away in some kind of elusive shelter, only to be accessed by those who have lost a loved one. Today, the right to grieve is for you. It is for everyone.

Emotions don't make you weak, they make you human.

Processing your grief begins with permission. No matter what your situation, it’s ok to take some downtime to recognize and eventually heal from your emotions.

Minimize your guilt as much as possible by knowing that you are doing the best you can considering the circumstances before you. Be kind to yourself, acknowledge you have a right to your feelings. Everyone does.

Journal about it.

Write it out, baby! Everything! Your journal is a safe space to say how you really feel. Some people aren’t comfortable with talking about their negative feelings, thinking that they need to remain positive. Expressing the negative thoughts paves the way to positivity. Writing about or stating your fears out loud will not make them come true. It’s persistent negativity that leads us down a less desirable path.

As you journal, turn your thoughts around by stating the potentially positive outcome as well as your fears. It may take a while to achieve this, and that is perfectly fine.

Find joy.

Yes, you heard me right. There are things you love doing that you can still do, even in isolation. There are precious moments in conversations, nature, interaction with your children, friendship, music, and even feel-good things in social media. Capture those moments and appreciate them. Feel them in your heart. Plant a smile on your face. Allowing yourself to feel the good helps to balance the bad.

Lean on someone.

I’m here for you and so are many other professionals who can help you through these times. Don’t restrict your conversations and your intake of information to the (many) negative factors of Covid-19. This is a time for self-growth. Let’s all come out of this as stronger, kinder, and more emotionally intelligent human beings. Find someone to support you on this journey!